Love is a challenge for long distance lovers. And there is a “his” and “hers” side to long distance relationships. Whether or not they last depends upon time and commitment.
In this tanking economy, many couples are going to find themselves seeking jobs wherever they can be found.
What will this mean for your relationship if it happens to you? I know quite a number of married couples who have done quite well on long distance relationships – both parties were (are) professional couples, totally devoted to each other because they have no children.
Stating up a relationship that is going to be long distance has a higher failure rate because the bond has not had time to establish itself
What are the success factors?
Success factors include ease of travel, time together (every two to three weeks is best), and an approximately equal income helps in terms of independence. Most often marriage is what makes the long distance relationship a success – unless it is a second marriage and children are involved. It helps to be in the same country, but if not, the same time zone helps to make communicating less stressful.
Advice columns: Most of the advice columns on LDRs – with regard to new couples – suggest an “end” time goal. Six months for marriage. But keep in mind that the LDR is artificial in itself – and that too many couples try it, move in together or wed – and then face the shock of routine or each other’s real habits and needs within three – six months. By then the thrill and the excitement are gone and day to day sets in. Yes, those are his dirty socks on your newly made bed!
For independent women, it often only takes only a few weeks of being with someone on their turf living their daily business routine to determine if the relationship can go forward. Relationships under the best conditions are stressful. If your circumstances in this economy force you into an LDR, keep the passion going!
What made me think of this column today? My guy from Dubai is flying in!
Reprinted from my Love and Marriage column, The Examiner.com
Copyright 2009 Rita Watson