Sometimes we take ourselves too seriously. If you can laugh at yourself he will love you all the more! Instead of being critical of him, how about laughing with him about his foibles — and keep your relationship happy!
Now there is a difference between his foibles and his sore spots. One should never tease her lover about his weight, his hairline, his mother, brother or sisters, his fears. Basically you are playing with poison if you do. But you can begin to turn your words of criticism into jokes that you can both enjoy and still get your point across.
How often have you noticed that your words — even said jokingly — are biting and hurtful? Perhaps you don’t realize it. But look at the faces of others when you are critical, it makes everyone uncomfortable.
Here is where laughter comes in. Shared humor creates a bond that helps you get over little frustrations or big disappointments. From that squirting pipe to the snow plow that damaged the garage. You really want to say something sarcastic or use a tone of voice that is biting, “Just when can I expect that you will fix that pipe? ”
Another tactic, “Honey, I know you have been busy, so I just bought a little blow-up boat so I can go downstairs to do the laundry.”
Maybe that’s not his style or yours. But humor can be cultivated. Watch movies that make you laugh together. Listen to what makes him double over with laughter. What kind of jokes does he respond to?
AND IF YOU ARE A GUY READING THIS — help! Maybe you can direct this movie. Find ways that you can laugh together. If she is always criticizing the way you dress — go to a thrift store and buy yourself some plaid pants match it with a pink shirt and pick up a vest. Tell her that you have decided it is time to take responsibility for the way you dress and you got yourself a new outfit. I am willing to bet you will both roar with laughter.
When you laugh it changes your mood and it creates life-enhancing properties.
Laughter is contagious — just look here at Laughter in London.
Copyright 2008 Rita Watson