Rita Watson: The Real Holiday Gift of Appreciation, December 25, 2011
This year Christmas and Hanukkah, which both celebrate miracles, overlap. Yet the significance to little miracles in our own lives seems to have been lost in gift-giving madness. Shopping anxiety has smothered the time when individuals essentially reestablish their relationship to tradition and belief within their hearts and with family and friends.
And in the seasonal frenzy, women bear the brunt of buying, wrapping, and hiding the presents to keep the illusion of Santa alive in the minds of children. How did this happen?
Hanukkah celebrates the miracle of light. It signifies how a small bit of pure olive oil for the Menorah miraculously kept a sacred Temple lit for eight days and nights after it had been reclaimed from invaders. However, according to Professor Dianne Ashton of Temple University, two Rabbis in Cincinnati developed this “new celebration for children at Hanukkah that was held in the synagogue and included giving presents.”
It was a way of being part of an American tradition similar to Christmas gift-giving. In the Christian tradition, gifts were brought by the Three Kings to welcome “the newborn king.” Eventually Saint Nicholas entered the picture and a new world of shopping usurped the religious aspect of the holiday.
With gift-giving comes re-gifting and returning. If your love gives you a gift that you really dislike should you return it? Or should you be grateful and keep it as a gesture to show your appreciation for the thought that went into the gift selection?
Last year Tatiana Morales told CBS that “42 percent of 18-34 year olds will return gifts, 39 percent of shoppers age 35-44, and 33 percent of shoppers 45 or older.” And more men than women will be making the returns. Are gifts playing too important a role in our holidays?
Instead of spending time shopping, and returning, this might be a time to start planning a new family gift tradition even now for next year. Perhaps consider these suggestions:
- Think about the concept of little miracles in your life each day and make a note of them. Then next holiday send a little Thank you book of miracles to people in your life who were responsible for mini-miracle surprises.
- Spend time with family sorting through photos and creating a family history or the story of your child, spouse or lover in an album.
- Support local businesses and museum gift shops.
Exchanging gifts that come from the heart reduce the stress and anxiety that seem to be synonymous with holiday shopping. By creating a new gift-giving tradition, you might find the real gifts that are worth treasuring are the gifts of love, appreciation, and gratitude. In the world of re-gifting, these will always be welcome.
Rita Watson, an incurable romantic, is our relationship columnist and regular Journal contributor whose web address is www.ritawatson.com