Oftentimes red-flags get waved away. But I am a firm believer that “red flags” can be a useful sign if we acknowledge them.
So just to confuse lovers it seems that red flags fall into two categories. Both mean danger but in some cases you can step back, look from a new perspective, and move on together — as in the following examples:
Many couples tell me that the new “Rules” say no make up sex. What is my thinking on this one? Don’t fight, just have sex. But on a serious note, it is possible to see two sides of an issue. Instead of arguing, negotiate.
On a regular basis go out on a date with your spouse or significant other — alone — and pretend it’s a first date all over again — and talk about dealbreakers instead of the usual “getting to know you.” Then look to see how close each of you are coming to drawing that line in the sand. Back up a bit.
Instead of focusing on “break-up” think about ways to mend the tear in the relationship.
Here is some advice from Dr. Laura Berman regarding red flags and cures Red Flags and Relationship Healers
For women: Another type of red For Men Common Mistakes (It’s late. I’m tried. And by morning, I will probably amend this!)
Copyright 2008 Rita Watson