The new book is controversial, choose a partner according to a checklist, then fall in love. It is based on a modern concept of arranged marriage.
But we are a love addicted society. We need to feel as if we are walking on air. We want to see rainbows and hear the music of the spheres. And then when we marry for love, we can prepare to divorce within 7 years, the lifespan of the average marriage today.
Want a better way? Reva Seth thinks she has found it. According to Helen Weathers writing for the UK’s Daily Mail Online: “Now, Reva is sharing the secret of her success in her new book, First Comes Marriage, which takes an unashamedly positive look at the principles behind the Asian tradition of marriages, which she believes can be adapted by Western women to protect themselves against the pitfalls of modern romance and the misery of divorce.”
It seems that Reva had only seven dates with the man whom she married, but she believes “a shared sense of cultural heritage and a similar set of goals in life” are key to a lasting relationship. The article notes the importance of ” finding someone who will be a good friend and partner both emotionally and spiritually – regardless of looks or wealth.”
Weathers says that “In researching her book, Reva interviewed more than 300 Asian women in Europe and North America who were happy in their marriages.” Read the full article at Forget love and attraction
Her book is at Amazon.com First Comes Marriage: Modern Relationship Advice from the Wisdom of Arranged Marriages
Love or money: The 2008 Valentine’s Day “Love and Money” survey of 1,049 people by Money Management International (MMI) found that over 73 percent of women viewed financial know-how as a more important factor in choosing a potential partner than attractiveness. Men opted for a woman’s looks.
Looks over values: Men who chose looks over values often find themselves paying a high price – as we saw with Sir Paul McCartney. But in particular older men, who need a younger woman to validate their sense of self and to stave off aging — will overlook values and settle for infatuation to fill their needs.
Copyright 2008 Rita Watson