Too often we hear the complaint from women: “He never talks to me.”
As we shift into a 24/7 Blackberry, laptop and two-paycheck society, there are too many couples on overdrive moving into the passive-aggressive or snipe-at-each-other lane.
When a car shows signs of stress, or needs a tune-up, men handle it immediately. There is a problem and men fix it.
In a relationship, who is responsible for the tune up? Perhaps women should take the lead.
Although men today are more involved in parenting and family than our fathers were, women have that sixth sense. Research at Yale indicates that women have so keen an intuition that they sense a relationship problem at its inception.
Skills instead of sniping: If men and women could develop their intuitive skills and interpret the silences, downcast eyes, uncomfortable moments and body language, perhaps more relationships could be saved. Or should women be using their gift to cultivate non-judgmental spaces within the home?
In a loving atmosphere with no hidden agendas, just simple clarity, both parties would benefit. When home is a sanctuary, men might find saying, “Can we talk?” is as easy as test driving a car.
Love and marriage: about …. is a new series of snippets that I will be presenting from time to time.
Copyright 2009 Rita Watson