Coping with summertime anxiety in children/ Rita Watson
Young children oftentimes live in a magical world of fairy tales and adventure. Yet those who may envision themselves as brave knights slaying dragons may be terrified of spiders. And children who love stories of sailing ships or mermaids may be frightened of the water. For all the daredevils ready to embrace adventure, there is a child who is afraid to go to camp or leave the house. Donna Pincus, Ph.D., is director of the Child and Adolescent Fear and Anxiety Treatment Program at BostonUniversity and she believes that parents can help children meet their fears.
Author of “Growing Up Brave: Expert Strategies for Helping Your Child Overcome Fear, Stress, and Anxiety,” she acknowledges that “being brave doesn’t mean that a child will never experience fear.” She said, “Being brave means that a child is learning to cope with a range of emotions, even the uncomfortable ones.” Nonetheless, despite fear, she says, “brave children do not let the stresses of the world stop them from participating in life’s experiences.”
According to the National Institute of Mental Health Fact Sheet on anxiety disorders in children and adolescents, a recent large-scale national survey reported that about 8 percent of teens ages 13-18 have an anxiety disorder, with symptoms commonly emerging around age 6.
However, parents know that anxiety and panic attacks can be seen much earlier in their own children.
What advice does Dr. Pincus have for parents? She has devised a bravery ladder that divides stressful events into baby steps. Instead of diving right into a situation that is tough, she advises that the child approach it bit by bit, gaining control with each step. She suggests information gathering, practicing, and praise.
Information gathering: “Help your child gather accurate information about the specific object or situation that he or she fears. Sometimes fears persist because children believe that the feared object/situation is more dangerous than it really is,” she said. “For example, a child afraid of the water might find pleasure in running through a sprinkler and enjoying the excitement of water droplets touching the skin.”
Some mothers with access to beaches have told me about the sand castle approach. They help their child build a sand castle, create a moat, then engage their child in filling buckets of water to make a stream until the child becomes more involved in filling the water bucket than with the castle.
Practice: Dr. Pincus finds that helping a child gain exposure to the feared object or situation has a positive effect on children. She explained, “Create a hierarchy of situations that you might practice with your child to help the child test his or her predictions about what might happen if he/she encounters the feared situation. For example, you can help a child to see that the object he or she is afraid of will not cause harm. Start with easier situations, such as petting a small dog, in the case of a dog phobia. A more difficult situation might be gradually petting larger dogs.”
Praise: In addition to information gathering and practicing, Dr. Pincus says, “Provide plenty of praise to your child when he or she encounters new situations/objects and faces his/her fears.”
Even teenagers can experience a range of anxiety disorders, such as specific fears and social anxiety and some of these fears might emerge during the summer because teens have to confront situations they may be afraid of, such as encountering bugs or animals in parks, or dealing with peers in camp or a summer job. For a resource on teens and children, Dr. Pincus has created the Child Anxiety Network (www.childanxiety.net).
It is her belief that “positive parent-child interaction generates greater confidence, joy, and excitement in children, and can help them learn skills for facing everyday stressful events.” Dr. Pincus added, “It is from parents that children learn the powerfully critical lessons — that it’s safe to try new things; that frustration and fear can be overcome; and that situations which make us afraid can be mastered.”
Rita Watson, MPH, (ritawatson.com) is a regular contributor to The Journal and a relationship columnist for The Providence Journal’s “All About You” section.
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