Rita Watson/ Providence Journal
The holiday music rings in the cheer of mistletoe and holly, carolers and parties. Then come the presents and gift cards, long lines at the post office and impatient crying children, obligations, expectations, and exhaustion.
How can it be that such a happy season is so filled with stress? Two things happen at the holidays: Our minds become a jumble of thoughts that can make us very anxious and even sad. Our bodies can become physically drained by too much to do in a too-busy world followed by sleepless nights.
What we thought would be simple and routine during the holidays turns into the insurmountable. Dr. James M. Ellison, an associate professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, explains what happens with holiday stress and sadness. “We build magical expectations of the holidays in our minds. When experience fails to match our hopes, as it often does, we become stressed and even depressed.”
“Each holiday season resonates with past holidays,” Dr. Ellison says. “If we have a history of happy holidays, the current ones benefit. But if loss, sadness, or disappointment were prominent in the past, these feelings color our present experience.”
In addition to our emotions, we pile on the rush and crush of trying to cram in too much in too little time.
Here are seven steps that will alleviate stress by helping you change the focus from holiday frenzy to patience, gratitude and love.
1. Practice time management realistically and remember very little takes a minute or even an hour.
2. Set priorities. Decide what is most important for you to accomplish in an eight-hour period.
3. Take minute vacations. Stop throughout the day to smell the roses, to take a walk, to gaze at the sunshine or clouds.
4. Clear your mind of negative thoughts that weigh you down, especially past hurt — these are millstones around your neck.
5. Express gratitude in a note, a phone call, a visit. Think of one person who deserves a note from you and jot it off immediately.
Send an e-mail — and follow it with a real note.
6. Search through photos that bring a smile to your face.
7. Stop and think about someone you love and wish blessings and happiness. It will help to build up a reserve of joy.
In the world of holiday giving: “Remember to treat yourself as well,” says Dr. Ellison.